In 2014, I lost my wife after a very long and distressing illness, in organising her funeral I was introduced to our local parish church and the priest who had only recently been appointed. I had never considered myself to be a church goer but after the funeral I felt that I wanted to go to the Sunday morning service. In attending the morning service, I found a little relief for a short while from the pain of losing a loved one and felt that I could say all the things I never said to my wife whilst she was alive.
As anyone who has lost a spouse will identify with, the hardest and darkest times are not in the first few weeks following the loss, but usually around the sixth month, when friends and family around you have started to get on with their lives but you have not and at this point the world can become a very lonely place, especially during the long dark nights. It was at this point in my life when the church and in particular the priest Father David reached out to me. It was as if he knew exactly how I was feeling and he gave freely his time providing a space for me to talk, to just sit and be quiet or to offer words of guidance and support. Looking back, the time I spent with Father David, helped me to understand how I was feeling, helped to console and to find peace of mind.
I am now a regular attendee at church and enjoy the friendship of being part of the church community. I try wherever possible to help at fundraising events and get involved with the social activities. My attendance at the Sunday morning service, gives me an opportunity for quiet thoughts and reflection about my life and allows me to remember and celebrate the life my wife and I had together. My faith has brought me an inner peace, new friends, a sense of belonging and enabled me to move on.
He attends St Margaret’s in Altofts, Wakefield